In this ZPR Live session, Todd and Cathy bring Zen Parenting back to Team Zen with a lively check-in that pivots to the big theme of the season: launching kids to college. They swap real-life stories with members about staying connected without hovering, reframing anticipatory anxiety, and spotting emotionally-immature parenting patterns (control, image-management). The convo offers practical, low-pressure ways to keep bonds strong—letters, shared playlists/shows, memory photos, ordinary texts—plus a powerful reminder to choose connection over surveillance, let rites of passage be kid-led, and notice when “familiar” isn’t the same as “healthy.” A spoiler-free nod to Netflix’s Unknown Number underscores how fear can cloud common sense.

Resources & ideas mentioned (bulleted)

  • Cathy’s Substacks:
    • Emotionally Immature Parents and the Work of Doing It Differently
    • How to Stay Connected When Your Kid Moves Out or Heads Off to College
    • The Unexpected Gift of Anticipatory Anxiety
    • Staying Decent in Indecent Times
  • Low-pressure connection tools: handwritten letters; shared Spotify/Apple Music playlists; “co-watching” a show and texting live reactions; photo flashbacks (“On this day…”).
  • Playful prompt: “pay-for-pics” checklist (e.g., $5 for first-day class pic; bonus for a veggies-at-dinner selfie; completion bonus by break).
  • Boundaries & trust: resist Life360 overuse; set expectations together; normalize delayed replies.
  • Rites of passage: let teens/young adults design and lead ceremonies—parents step back, kids step up.
  • Lens check: “Familiar ≠ healthy”; watch for fear-driven interpretations; practice curiosity over judgment.
  • Unknown Number tie-in: overinvolvement and status anxiety can block simple safety moves (e.g., pausing phone use during harassment).

Millie’s resource

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Fun idea to stay connected with your kid in college

For those of you that want pictures but never get them (usually boy moms). Copy and paste to send to your students.

Pictures for Cash (I will send cash via ___ app as soon as I get the pic)

Full length pic of you on the first day of class – $5

You and friends for a birthday dinner – $5

You eating vegetables or salad – $5

Your bed made with your new comforter – $2

You eating breakfast before 10am with breakfast food – $2

You and a new friend – $3

You at (a site on campus) -$3

You hanging your clean clothes – $5

Dorm room clean with proof of the date and time during the month of October – $10

You and friends doing something while cheering for (school) in spirit wear – $5

Fully decorated RA’s door – $5

You at a club activity – $3

Dorm room decorated for a holiday – $5

Picture of something new you purchased for yourself $2

You and roommate from last year (older students)  $5

$25 bonus for completing all by Christmas break