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Jason Collins comes out as the first openly gay current NBA star. We discuss why this will help our culture to continue to evolve to be one of inclusiveness instead of one of exclusion. We also talk how this will positively affect all young boys and girls who are gay now might be able to look at this situation and imagine possibilities of their own life that were otherwise more difficult to see. We discuss ...
The Butterfly Effect, you have heard of it right? What you do has ripples and effects others around the world. In the wake of the Boston Bombings, and all of the activities that have taken place since, it appears that there is no better display of the Butterfly Effect to be seen right now. Cathy and Todd talk about how teaching your children about this idea can lead them down the road to success and ...
Cathy and Todd follow up on last week’s ADHD discussion because they received some not-so-happy feedback from some listeners. They address the fact that often times when a child is medicated, it can be a very difficult and well thought out decision, it’s not always thought of as a quick fix. But in too many cases, it’s the first choice, and that’s where a new perspective or different options may make a difference. They also ...
Are there “alternative” ways to deal with ADHD other than popping a pill? Cathy and Todd discuss the significant number of children that are diagnosed with ADHD (6.4 million children) and why 2/3 of them are given a prescription. Todd recalls a recent experience where he witnessed a 40+ year old bully a 10 year old boy – he wishes he could have the moment back and do it differently. Todd and Cathy face-off on ...
Cathy and Todd talk about sibling rivalry, how it’s good “life practice”, and the differences between what’s normal and when it’s a good idea to interfere. They also talk about family meetings and how to get everybody on the same page (before the kids tune you out). Todd talks about Lisa Reagan‘s article titled “Why and How Do We Shift” (in Pathways to Family Wellness Magazine) where she shares four different ways to open up ...
You are not alone if you have shamed your kid this week. Why hide all of the truth? Let’s get it out in the open and talked freely about being shamed, because their is a good chance it happened to you. This week Cathy and Todd continue to talk about Brene Brown’s shame and vulnerability research. They discuss 6 ways to NOT respond when someone shares something deep or shameful, why some friends are easier ...
Are you worrying yourself sick? Is that even possible? Cathy (with the support of Brene Brown) helps Todd through his continuous struggle over money, worry, & fear. He’s frustrated with the amount of worry he’s carrying because it brings down his mood. He’s worrying about worrying and feeling bad about feeling bad. In order for us to be good parents, we must figure out a way to be a good example of how to allow ...
Has Todd hit his boiling point when it comes to how much screen time his daughters have? The iPad is taking over and he can’t control it! Can Cathy help Todd come to love the iPad for what it can be? Who else spent all their hard earned cash as kids playing video games when they were young? Times have changed. Now there is no reason to go to the Arcade, because you can save ...
While Todd didn’t see the stress of standardized tests in the latest episode of HBO’s “Girls”, it did stress him out because he is worried about his own children. Will his own three daughters stay healthy if this is the way things are when they’re in their 20’s. Maybe Todd shouldn’t watch so much HBO. As for the standardized testing issue, every state and most parents have to deal with it and the stress it ...
We discuss two related topics: Know anyone who lives life through their children? Can you be too close to your children? Do you know parents that have a case of the “We’s” – Do you find parents who say things like “We are trying to make the soccer team” or “We decided to do ballet this summer.” This can sometimes be a sign that parents might be a little too close to their children ...
Cathy and Todd discuss “disengagement” and how it can erode the trust in a relationship – your partner may not be cheating or abusive, but if they emotionally disengage, it can be very painful. They also discuss how we disengage from our children and how it makes them feel unsafe. We often talk about Domestic Violence against women, but what about when a man is abused by a woman? How does this type of domestic ...
Have you ever heard of the term “childism”? Neither had Cathy or Todd, until they heard about a book by Elizabeth Young Bruehl called “Childism: Confronting Prejudice Against Children” They discuss the increasing trend of parents using social media to humiliate their children to demonstrate authority. Todd really struggles with parents who punish and exert unfair tactics against their children. In this episode, learn how to discipline kids without humiliation so that the discipline works ...
Cathy and Todd talk REAL love vs SPIDER love (taken from Martha Beck’s book, Steering by Starlight) – do you love authentically or do you “make” people love you by controlling their behavior OR altering your behavior so you don’t “bother” them? REAL love is about sharing your true self and setting the ones you love free so they can be their true selves. They also discuss if it’s wise to talk to our kids ...
How exactly are we teaching our sons “to be a man”? Have you ever used the phrase- “You throw like a girl.” Most have and we explain why it’s the little things that add up to make your son less of a man and create your sons’ overall perception of women. 1 in 5 women in America will report that they were sexually assaulted. We discuss Colin Stokes Ted Talk regarding the movies we watch ...
Dr. Kelly from Tree of Life Chiropractic joins Todd and Cathy for a discussion about the flu and the flu shot. There’s a lot of panic right now, but there are many effective ways to take care of you and your family. Dr. Kelly shares information and resources that may ease your mind. And Cathy and Todd discuss the Lance Armstrong interview – are we practicing forgiveness or do we feel the need to punish? ...
Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of listening, inside and out. How yoga/quiet time can help our kids, and how listening to what our kids have to say (instead of being punishing and punitive) can help us be better parents. They specifically discuss a San Diego school that has incorporated yoga into their curriculum – certain parents aren’t happy about it, what do you think? They also discuss the “police stories” of their childhood, and ...
Why was the Violence Against Women Act, initially passed in 1994, allowed to expire? Todd and Cathy discuss this, women’s safety, and how India is peacefully protesting violence against women. They also discuss the key to keeping a relationship alive and healthy, and they reference the movie Hope Springs ...
Are you ready to shine this year? Are you ready to help your kids shine this year? Todd and Cathy discuss three simple ways to make this a possibility. They also discuss an article in The New York Times by David Brooks about a dad who tells his kids he’s ashamed and disappointed in them so they change – does he think shame and guilt will work and does he understand his role in their ...
Cathy and Todd discuss this quote they found on Dr. Christiane Northrup’s Facebook page. Sounds harsh, but is it true? Does your family tend to tip-toe around one person during the holidays? Does one person’s difficulties become everybody’s difficulties? They discuss setting appropriate boundaries with a bah humbug relative so you can hold on to your Christmas Spirit. They also discuss personal responsibility and how your attitude is always your decision. How do you view ...
Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of personal responsibility in the wake of a tragedy. You can do something, you can make a change. Focus on what you are doing, giving, saying on an everyday basis – what kind of ripples are you putting out into the world? Are you focused on love or anger? Giving or taking? Being “right” or making a connection? They also discuss the importance of grieving, stigmas around mental illness, ...
How do we teach our sons to respect women? It starts with women loving themselves. Todd and Cathy discuss Jada Pinkett Smith’s Facebook post and how degrading women hurts men just as much. They also discuss Cathy’s latest blog about self love, how to talk to our kids about death, and how much they love the original Karate Kid ...
Einstein said the most important question we can ask ourselves is whether the universe is kind. What do you think? Cathy and Todd discuss universal principles, faith, miracles, and how these belief systems effect our parenting. They also discuss Debbie Downers, why negative thinking can be harmful, and Marianne Williamson’s new book ...
The battle you have all been waiting for- ZPR vs Parenting Unplugged. This is a “no holds barred” cage match to decide who is the better show… and the better parents for that matter. This is one that you won’t want to miss ...
Cathy and Todd had the honor of talking with Rev Ed Bacon, author of the 8 Habits of Love and host of Oprah’s Soul Series on XM Radio. They discuss everything from forgiveness, to self awareness, and why choosing love over fear is an essential decision when it comes to your partner, your kids, or even yourself. In true ZP style, they even talk about the best movie, the best candy bar, and who Rev ...
Cathy has been emailing Todd articles about being “too busy” and today they talk about it. Why is this the social norm and why are we so comfortable with busyness? (Best two articles Article- Are you as busy as you think by Dr. Laura Vanderkam and Simple Yet Astounding Ways to Calm Down by Norman Fisher). They also discuss Ed Bacon’s 8 Habits of Love (Ed will be a guest on ZP next week!) and which habit they love ...
Do you talk about politics in front of your kids? Of course you share your perspective, but do you also say the other side is bad, evil, or whatever negative word you can find? We discuss Dr. Peggy Drexler’s blog titled “Talking to Kids about Politics” – Talking to our kids about our viewpoint is great, but showing compassion for the other side is even better. Cathy and Todd also talk about Annie Burnside’s latest ...
Do you want one child, two, three, four? Everybody has an opinion, but what’s right for you? Cathy and Todd share their decision making process and discuss why it’s important to respect other people’s choices when it comes to family size. Ann Coulter made news when she decided to tweet the r-word, and John Franklin Stephens made bigger news when he wrote an open letter explaining why this word is offensive – Cathy and Todd ...
We talk about the brave and beautiful Malala and her strength and determination to speak up for education. We discuss how teach our children how lucky they are to have access to education and other human rights. We also share thoughts on how to deal when you kids make friends with difficult kids (and start mimicking their behavior…). Join us! ...
Did you read Allison Tate’s blog titled, The Mom Stays in the Picture? Cathy and Todd discuss why moms step out of photographs and therefore aren’t captured in the memories. Yes, there’s the vanity issue, but Cathy thinks there are deeper issues, too (shocking!). Todd also shares a lot of hangover stories – once upon a time he was the life of the party, but having kids gave him some perspective. They also discuss the ...
Would you make your kids wear a sign that says, “I’m a thief?” Or would you shoot your child’s computer and then post it on Facebook? Maybe not, but have you ever humiliated your child in front of their friends or family? Cathy and Todd discuss the shame involved in humiliation and why we need to “wake up” before making a choice that could negatively effect our children. They also discuss yelling and fighting in ...
Are you the only parent who has to stay at the party or the sports practice? Do you feel like your kid needs your support all the time, but other kids don’t seem to need their parents? Cathy and Todd discuss “needy” kids and why listening to their needs is important today, and in the long run (and they discuss Cathy’s recent blog about this very experience). They also discuss the importance of stillness/quiet time/contemplation ...
Did you know that our first impulse is to be generous? But if we sit and think about it too long, we often change our mind. Cathy and Todd discuss this research and also Ed Bacon’s new book called The Eight Habits of Love (#1 being generosity!). They also discuss attachment parenting and what some call detachment parenting (taken from a Huffington Post article), birthday parties, and why Todd thinks kids should feel more pain at ...
Judging is normal. All humans judge situations so they can better assess what to do next. BUT, we have to notice when we are judging and realize that our assessments aren’t always correct. Cathy and Todd discuss how to assess whether something is true by using Byron Katie’s method titled The Work. Todd also decides that you can’t say you love your children unless you are practicing love – he gets angry when abusive men/and ...
When it comes to sports, do you encourage or push? Cathy and Todd discuss why supportive encouragement is great, but pushing can be harmful. Do you want your kids to play your sport and live your dream, or do you want them to figure out what they enjoy? They also discuss the obsession with sports and Todd’s three fantasy football teams – you read that right, THREE ...
Are girls “meaner” than boys? A lot of parents say this, but is it really true? Cathy and Todd discuss this and refer to Cathy’s latest blog about why calling girls mean can be harmful. They also discuss three things that every man should know about women – ladies, make sure your husband listens to this podcast! It can open up great conversations about what you need and why! Finally, they talk about the man ...
What do you do when your toddlers (or older kids) come into your bed in the middle of the night? Are you used to it? Does it drive you crazy? Todd and Cathy discuss night-time options and their own personal experiences. They also discuss why making casual negative remarks about your kids in front of your kids (i.e. “I can’t wait until this guy goes back to school…”) may be harmful. They also discuss wool ...
Are your kids interrupting you all the time? Is it causing you to feel annoyed or resentful? Cathy and Todd discuss setting boundaries on interruptions while simultaneously treating your children with respect. If you want them to respect you, you need to role model what this means. This is an EXTENDED show (about 15 minutes longer than usual) thanks to listeners saying they wanted MORE. So we also discuss mindful eating, the first day of ...
Are you always volunteering for things you don’t want to do? Cathy and Todd discuss “people pleasing” and follow up their discussion from last week about trying to “change” your partner (or anyone else for that matter). They also discuss Cathy’s migraine headache, the differences between principles and laws, and why the OWN TV Network is so ridiculously great ...
You want to grow, you want to learn, you want to more enlightened….that’s great, but don’t push it on the rest of the family! Cathy and Todd discuss loving your loved ones for who they are, not who you want them to be in the future. Enjoy your journey and allow others to follow your lead! And if “self help” or “new age” sounds to “out there”, find a word or word that works for ...
We are so uncomfortable with anger, but the truth is that it’s there to HELP us. It reminds us when our boundaries have been crossed or when we aren’t being true to ourselves. Cathy and Todd share personal stories of anger and how it transformed their way of thinking. Once we embrace how anger can be helpful, it won’t scare us as much when our children get angry. They also discuss The Dark Knight Rises ...
How do you support and understand a child who has experienced trauma? Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of listening and supporting as a child grieves and processes through a challenging experience. Remember that pain is pain – it could be the tragedy in Colorado, a divorce in the family, or the loss of a goldfish – children need to time to share their feelings and express their hurt. They also discuss Cathy’s latest blog ...
You may say this, but do you really do this? When someone doesn’t agree with you, do you make them bad, wrong, or mean, or do you accept their differences and love them anyway? Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of loving your neighbor (friend, opposing political party, etc) even when you don’t see eye to eye. They also discuss how they handled the tree in their backyard being cut down – it wasn’t easy ...
Cathy and Todd discuss “The Busy Trap” from the NY Times – do you create your own busyness or do you believe busyness “happens” to you? They also discuss mammogram anxiety and share tips to relieve doctor anxiety or everyday anxiety ...
Cathy and Todd discuss why it’s important to role model contentment for our children. Instead of believing that situations or people should “make us” content, can we find contentment in our own skin? Is contentment the same thing as happiness? Listen and find out! They also discuss Cathy’s girl weekend, the hot weather, and whether or not Aquaman was a true superhero – what did he do? How did he help? ...
Why the truth will set you free! Cathy and Todd break down the differences between men and women. Plus Todd offers some tips to eliminate having to ask your wife, “What’s wrong?” 10 time before she’s ready to answer. You only have to ask once if you listen to this podcast. Don’t miss the spat between Cathy and Todd regarding air conditioning usage and one really funny line, also the dangers of conformity- even in yoga ...
Todd doesn’t understand why women need to be asked -“What’s wrong?” 10 times before women will answer, and Cathy doesn’t understand why everybody tells Todd he looks like Tom Cruise (but he kind of does). Todd and Cathy also discuss getting in the “now”, being mindful, and teaching our kids to do the same. Cathy’s workshop– Mind, Body, Spirit Workshop @ Dailey Method this Wednesday @ 12:00 ...
Did you view the commencement speech about the kids not being special? Do you think the speaker is right? Do you believe that “trophies for everyone” is a bad idea? Cathy and Todd discuss what makes someone “special” and why making everything about “being the best” isn’t good for our kids. Can we help our kids understand that they are special without making them compete for it? Can we help our children appreciate competition without making ...
We get so excited for summer, but then we miss the structure of a school year. Cathy and Todd discuss the joys and challenges of easing into the summer schedule, and finding the balance between structure and taking it easy. They also discuss the demands and challenges of difficult people, and why hangovers just don’t make sense anymore ...
Cathy and Todd discuss spanking and why it sends a mixed message. Discipline means “to teach” so what are you teaching when you spank? How are you feeling when you spank – can you separate feeling from action? Listen as they discuss alternatives and why spanking is such a hot-button issue ...
Cathy and Todd discuss “reconnecting” with kids when they seem quiet, distant, or just completely uninterested in you. Todd shares his struggle to connect with his daughter and realizes he may not be speaking her “love language“. They also discuss the importance of staying connected to older kids and the importance of physical touch ...
